Movie review: “Aquaman”

Splat. The marine installment of the DC Extended Universe has arrived, and boy is it soggy. An exposition-laden, by-the-numbers origin story detailing Arthur Curry’s (Jason Momoa) struggle to accept his destiny to ascend a throne and unite the world of Atlantis with the world above… you know what, my eyeballs are drying out and life […]

Movie review: “Spiderman: Into the Spiderverse”

Real quick: how many Spiderman movies have there been since you started counting? Five? Eighteen? Ninety-three? What happens if you start counting all the movies that Spiderman just appears in? At this point, I’ve been subjected to more stories about Spiderman than I have about Batman, and slightly more about Batman than I have about Jesus, […]

Movie review: “Justice League”

A long time ago, in an America far, far away, there was a movie adaptation of Alice Hoffman’s jewel-like novel, “Practical Magic”. Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman were wisely chosen to play witch siblings Sally and Gillian; Stockard Channing and Dianne Wiest, the sisters’ maiden aunts. The actresses got drunk as hell for the scenes […]

Movie review: “Wonder Woman”

  DC has arrived. Kicking and screaming, getting in its own way at every opportunity, the Little Movie Studio That Couldn’t has finally put an unqualified win on the board with “Wonder Woman”. Gal Gadot is note-perfect in Patty Jenkins’s cohesive vision, creating a Wonder Woman / Diana Price who’s worth waiting for. Like all […]

Movie review: “The LEGO Batman Movie”

Three years ago, “The LEGO Movie” surprised everyone by being genuinely funny and heartfelt, with a tear-jerking final twist balanced like a lemon peel on the edge of the movie’s sugared rim. For many, the best part of the movie was a cameo appearance by Batman as a sullen, brooding tool who “only works in […]

POEM XLIX: “ORIGIN STORY”

My job, as I understand it, is to get the coffee away from Dr. Finkl before he starts to vibrate like a poorly balanced centrifuge. Mrs. Finkl told me so; they’ve been married forty years, and he’s onto her tricks by now. He will not set the Thermos down whenever she’s in the lab, but […]